Photograph: Becca's son, Baby Mirko
Becca asks:
Is there anything in your Mom archive that you feel 100% confident about and it worked for all nine kids? i.e. latching on technique, sleep routines, bath time rituals, a non-fussy baby, etc? How did you manage to please all the kids?
Dear Becca,
I really would love to give you some great answers to your question that would work always and for each child but unfortunately, I can't. As each mother is different, so is each child. The only real thing that I can say worked 100% of the time for me was to RELAX! I really believe that a child can sense when it's mother is stressed thus causing a vicious cycle. I know that whenever I was calm and just took things as they came along, baby seemed much more pleasant. It's nice to try to keep on some kind of schedule but don't get crazy if you can't stay on it. Babies are quite adaptable! So relax, enjoy and embrace this time, it goes so quickly!
Stress-free Motherhood
Natural Childbirth
Jenny in Columbus, Ohio said...
Dear Allyn,
I am pregnant with my first baby and was told that I need to write a birth plan. I've heard so much about how great epidurals are and was wondering if your births were natural or with pain medication. I've considered a natural birth, but the pain free option sounds really great! Two of my friends even said that they are just going to schedule c-sections when they are pregnant! Thanks, and I can't believe you've had nine!
Dear Jenny,
Thank you for the question! First of all, it is a really good idea to have a plan for the big day, just remember to be flexible because anything can happen. I think c-sections are necessary if that is what the doctor recommends but keep in mind that it is major surgery. Unfortunately, recovery may be prolonged which may hinder your bonding experience.
I was blessed with nine healthy babies and am happy to say nothing compares with the many emotions associated with natural childbirth. That is not to say there wasn't pain involved, but it was worth every second. I truly feel that if we are able to grow a baby inside, we certainly are equipped with birthing it.
I too wanted to see how different it would be with an epidural and chose that route with the last two. While it did lessen the pain for one, the second wasn't as successful which I wasn't prepared for. Looking back, I'm glad I can compare the two options (with and without epidural) but I have a great appreciation of what my body can endure.
I hope I could help in your decision and good luck on your special day.
How It All Began
Over four years ago, my second oldest daughter married. Now pregnant with her first child (due March 23rd, 2008), we talk constantly about pregnancy and motherhood. Her questions and concerns bring my nine pregnancies flooding back to me and, while I don't have all the answers, I do have the experience. After all, with nine children and twenty-seven years of parenting, I've embraced motherhood as my career. Now that I am being promoted to the "Grandma Club," I've decided to begin sharing my experiences with other moms out there (new and old).
To share a little more background, I am a stay at home mom with nine children: Caroline-27, Kristin-25, Kelly-23, Dominique-21, Joseph-19, Grace-13, Fredrick-11, Daniel-9, and John-7. At this current time in my life, I am balancing the anxieties involved with keeping track of five kids who live out of the home, the changes that come with a young teenage daughter, and three active boys in elementary school! It isn't always easy! For example, this spring (all within weeks of each other), I have a daughter getting married, another having a baby, a third graduating from college while the youngest of the girls is starring in her first play! It isn't always this hectic, but every mom can relate to being stretched too thin. So how does anyone expect us to keep our sanity?
While I continue to work my way through motherhood, I will use this website as a tool to aid other busy, worried and stressed out moms. The space is designed to be a place to share our resources with each other. Whether it be tried and true tricks of the trade, or a lead to one of the many trusted sources around, I will do my best to point you in the right direction. So if you have questions about stretch mark creams, cloth diapers (my daughter and I are making our own), moving your child to a new school, paying for college, paying for a wedding (or five), and just making it as a mom, you've come to the right place! I've also decided to include input and updates from my daughter, Kristin. As she enters motherhood, she will address issues like balancing baby and career, how to have a baby without breaking the bank, and and ways to parent organically.
Most importantly, we are all just searching for a little understanding, especially when our dreams of becoming the perfect mom blow up in our face with a jar of Gerber baby carrots. At the very least, I hope that this site can provide every mom with a little peace of mind!